T minus one and counting...

I don't usually go to see movies on their opening night. Or the opening weekend. Or any time there is likely to be a line, because crowds suck. But I think I'm going to have to make an exception for Clerks II. I've been looking forward to this movie for a long time. Jersey Girl notwithstanding, I have faith in Kevin Smith, and I expect Clerks II to be a lot of fun. This movie got an 8-minute standing ovation at Cannes for cryin' out loud, and without being some incomprehensible artsy-fartsy arthouse flick.

Movies are supposed to be entertaining. And low-brow humor, when done right, is highly entertaining. It is unfortunate that some people cannot remove the sticks from their asses and just go with it. Take Joel Siegel for example. Apparently he made quite the show of walking out of the press screening early into the movie. Smith says "I can't fault Mr. Siegel for feeling 'revolted' (his producer's description of Joel's reaction) by our flick; in truth, there is a donkey show in it, and I recognize that brand of whimsy might not be for everybody. Film appreciation is very subjective, and maybe Joel just isn't into ass-to-mouth conversations." But apparently Siegel missed the payoff: "Never mind the fact that the scene he was offended by (the ordering of the donkey show), with its (misleading) crude references is only the set-up to a third act pay-off that is a true bait-and-switch from where Joel's imagination went..."

For me, what separates the good movies of this type from the bad (and the ugly) is the presence of something besides an endless string of raunchy jokes. A good plot is essential, and the movie has to have heart. Vulgar comedies that have a touch of sweet sensitivity underlying the crudeness can rise to greatness. Ultimately, you have to sympathize with one or more characters and give a damn what happens to them. It is why American Pie is far superior to its two sequels, both of which lack the heart of the original. When you strip away all the gags (which are brilliantly funny), at heart American Pie is a rather sweet story of some teens learning about life, love, and sex. Good stories are what made Team America and Beavis and Butthead Do America more than just delivery vehicles for gratuitously gross gags. Sincerity and likeable characters are the reason the Austin Powers movies stand up to repeated viewings. And Office Space is a masterpiece that anyone who has ever worked for a soul-sucking corporation can understand and love.

So I'll be treating myself to Clerks II this weekend. I expect to have a hell of a good time! And to laugh myself silly at that donkey show scene...