Monday, June 09, 2008

The Inconsiderate Holidays

'Tis the season that I do not enjoy - daily email "promotions" and "don't forgets" arrive to draw my attention to a holiday that is a painful reminder of what I no longer have. In the past, I still had Big Daddy to celebrate. That tempered the empty feeling somewhat. No sense being morose when I had a grandfather to be with. But now I don't. For PDM, it is worse, having lost both of his parents and all of his grandparents. He gets a double dose of depression in May and June. Maybe it would feel different if we were parents ourselves... but that isn't looking very likely.

So I am thinking we need to find something distinctly different to do on Sunday. I still think about my Dad every day, even after fifteen years. I could do without the endless reminders of yet another Father's Day without him. Any ideas? I'm thinking maybe a movie. We still haven't seen "Iron Man". But maybe a comedy is in order.

11 comments:

LL said...

Is that this Sunday?

Go see Iron Man. It'll make you laugh.

*hug*

Dianne said...

I think Iron Man is a great escape choice.

hugs from me too

TheWriteGirl said...

My dad died when I was 10. I long ago learned to ignore Father's Day. You will too. Chin up.

wa11z said...

Iron Man is what you want to see. And yes, you'll learn to ignore these holidays.

Jeni said...

Father's Day was a day that always made me sad when I was growing up because I never knew my Dad -he died when I was 17 days old. Like you, I did have my beloved grandpa with me till I was 12 years old but still, the holiday was one that always brought a certain amount of pain, and now, it is more just poignant memories of many years gone by now. You do learn after a time to not be quite so raw when those type of celebrations come up year after year, but if you ever are able to push it down completely, out of sight, out of mind, I think then those who can do that are pretty emotional gone then, don't you? Find some way perhaps to commemorate those loved ones, do honor in their names perhaps, and it keeps the memory alive and a segment of them with you then. Just a thought.

fermicat said...

ll, diane, and wa11z - looks like Iron Man is the plan.

thewritegirl and jeni - I thought 27 was too young... wow. I can't imagine.

Kathleen said...

I ignore Father's Day as well. It simply doesn't exist in my world.

Take comfort in the fact that you had a loving father who cared about you and about whom you care.

Mine's alive, for what it's worth.

magnetbabe said...

What do you mean you aren't parents? Last time I counted you have three furry children. Focus on all PDM does for you and the kids and have a great time at the movie. Sorry you both are lonely for your own dads/grandpas, I'd share mine if I could.

fermicat said...

kat - I have a friend in a similar situation to yours vis-a-vis her father. And my own dad did not have a good relationship with his father either. Kids don't get over being abandoned, even after they grow up.

magnetbabe - the cats never remember to get us cards or gifts. Ungrateful...

JennyC&F said...

I never had a father to celebrate fathers day with. Mom and I would celebrate something else. Just some random thing she came up with that we both enjoyed, like my faviorte one was, "Mad Hatters day" And we both wore a crazy hat where-ever we went that day and when people look'ed at us odd, we just bust out laughing. Think on it. You'll figure it out.

JennyC&F said...

P.S.
Plant the cats a Cat Nip garden or a small garden with mint (winter was Emer's fav) mixed with CN.