Dork Central

If you've ever been to any type of "physics convention" then you know what I mean. The rest of you can only imagine. And reality is so much worse...

Traveling Again

Q. What's dark, ridiculously loud, and kind of stinky?

A. The last row of a MD-88 aircraft.

I'm in Philly until Thursday, for a frenzied week of continuing education activities (oh, joy). The 7:30am start time doesn't thrill me, nor do the long days, but it will be fun to see some old friends.

Oh wow, it's Friday again.

My life is upside down (I'll explain later), so here are some lolcats. And it's a physics theme!


see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Ghost In The Machine?

Physics has invaded my dreams in a big way since I ramped up the studying this month. The weirdest nightmare occurred a few nights ago. I was doing some routine tests on the linear accelerator and it started, well, messing with me. Moving stuff when I wasn't looking, wrecking my test results, making mischief. And then it got nasty. Then the next thing I knew, I was somehow stuck to the gantry head, hanging on for dear life as it rotated around and around, faster and faster. I couldn't jump off without injury, and couldn't make it stop. There are lots of emergency off switches, but none in the head. (In reality, it isn't capable of continuous rotation. It will do a full circle, but only once around so the cables don't get tangled. But since when has reality ever gotten in the way of a vivid dream?) I tried to yell for someone to hit one of those emergency off switches, but could only manage a hoarse whisper. No one could hear me because I was inside the shielded vault without a voice, and the machine was out to get me. Because this linac was evil. Lets just hope the board examiners aren't.

Countdown = 25 days

Deferential Equations

I have been reading an online discussion group for people who are preparing for the radiological physics board exams, and happened upon a post complaining about the physics educational requirements. Imagine that? They actually want you to have a physics background before they will certify you as a physicist. The nerve! Anyway, this person said that she is good in the clinic but doesn't think she would be able to pass a Quantum Physics or Deferential (sic) Equations class. Of course I could not resist the urge to mock this (for those who were not forced to take advanced math, the subject is Differential Equations). Instead of doing it on the public discussion group (because I am not a complete ass), I send PDM a snarky email quoting this comment. I knew he would be sure to appreciate the humor of it all. And indeed, he did. This is what he sent back:

"Well, wasn't that the most well-mannered 2nd order inhomogenous equation? Always saying 'no, sir' and 'yes, please'. So agreeable when I required it to have constant coefficients. And not the slightest peep of complaint when I changed the initial conditions of the problem."

"Oh, you're so right. Most inhomogeneous equations nowadays are so disrespectful, requiring you to use the Method of Frobenius--or even numerical integration, for Heaven's sake! But that equation was so courteous--it even offered to transform itself into an integral equation and solve itself using Green's function techniques. Talk about good upbringing!"

"No doubt, no doubt. I've never known an equation so willing to go out of its way on my behalf. Manners will show."